


A Farewell For A Hello

by daeseol



Series: Of the King and His Men [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-16
Updated: 2015-07-16
Packaged: 2018-04-09 15:32:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4354418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daeseol/pseuds/daeseol
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Junmyeon finally wins his game at the palace. He’s happy for a moment until he realizes he is yet to win another game in his heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Farewell For A Hello

**Author's Note:**

  * For [khrysallis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/khrysallis/gifts).



> 1\. Prompt is “Goodbyes should never have existed” from Chrys because I said I wanna try writing a short fic. Actually, it kind of drifted a bit from the prompt because I’m sorry I really can’t sad story and I already have drafted half of the fic before realizing I actually digressed  
> 2\. And since I can't short fic anymore, I decided that this is going to be part of a series about the king, Junmyeon, and the noblemen in and out of his court (hence the introduction of two new characters at the end). This fic in particular is the Suho/Kai "arc."  
> 3\. DEFAULT NOTE: The story takes place in a _fictional 18th-19th century "industrializing" monarchical united Korea_. Here is a **[map](http://i.imgur.com/dcxqkb0.jpg)** in case you get confused with the names of places/titles. The map will be updated as the story progresses (a.k.a. as the series moves on).

The first four years of Junmyeon’s reign are nothing but an every minute step closer to danger, almost always within the reach of death. On his succession to the throne, it has always been chaos in the palace too early for a young king. The quietness of its beautiful exteriors casts a false facade of peace, housing a drama beyond the knowledge of his people. His people are actually a source of his envy when they live in the serenity of their basic homes, a harrowing reverse of what Junmyeon has to go through. He's done nothing wrong. He's simply taken the crown in all its legality, passed onto him by his dying half-sister, the late Queen. It’s a miracle that he’s still alive since that day, in fact. Six assassination plots so far and probably counting.  
  
So on that fateful night, when Minseok, his spymaster and friend, knocks on his door and asks him to sign the final conviction orders, his hands shake in unexplainable bliss and relief. They've finally won the messy political game between his side and the whole of the old reign's court. He hates killing people, whether by his own hands or through his power. But he's the King, a symbol that many wants and will fight for death to gain.  
  
This is the last of his orders, the final men against him who will dirt blades of his reign with their filthy blood. He fights back his tears as he pulls a quill, dips it in ink, and draws his initials. For the first time he sees his name as saving grace.  
  
"Congratulations your Majesty," Minseok mutters. His voice is almost loud in the quietness of the night. Junmyeon's room is a gloom, almost drowned in darkness if not for the candelabra of melted candles that saves them from blindness.  
  
"Thank you," Junmyeon says, dropping the quill back in the ink bottle. He leans on his chair and finally realizes the comforts of its cushion, the same chair that felt horribly rigid and confining for the past years. The execution happens three days from now and he can already imagine the city plaza. He can hear the jeers of the crowd and the horrible, scary last beats of his enemies' hearts. It's going to be bright really soon.  
  
"Do you want to witness it, your Majesty?" Minseok asks as he rolls the order back and keeps it in his pocket, safe and secure. Junmyeon raises a hand and shakes his head, a gesture that translates to a no. Minseok understands. He bows his head, stepping backwards but Junmyeon straightens in a snap and the spymaster holds back his exit. He turns around, facing his king with curious eyes. "Is...there anything you need, your Majesty?"  
  
Junmyeon remembers somebody, a person who's neither his enemy nor a friend. The last portion of his thought clenches on his chest. He was a friend. The fact that he hasn't become an enemy should make Junmyeon feel somehow better but it doesn't help in appeasing this sudden influx of familiar yet still heavy emotions.  
  
"The Duke of Hamgyeong," Junmyeon whispers. The name spills, rolling out of his lips as if they're held back but Minseok manages to catch them clearly. His face doesn't contort, expression still plain and as objective as he usually is, as if it's something he expects. "Where is he?"  
  
"He's back to his palace in Hamheung," Minseok says, his prompt answer never failing to amuse Junmyeon. "Do you wish to arrange a visit?"  
  
Junmyeon contemplates, almost hesitant to say yes but he nods before he can think right through his impulsive decision.  
  
"Arrangements will be done then," Minseok nods in agreement. "If there is anything the Majesty still needs?"  
  
The raise of Junmyeon's hand, second this night, is final. Nothing else. Minseok steps backward before turning around. The door latches on its lock and Junmyeon is alone again in the dim. He's entirely unsure of his decision but he feels that any minute now, it'll sink in. He shall think of this in the next hours, until preparations are finished for his travel to the south.  
  
  
  
  
The execution of Junmyeon's opponents is apparently a popular move. The kingdom has rejoiced at the death of his rival earls who seemed to be as much an enemy of the people as they are to him. Throughout the execution, Junmyeon remains in his court and it isn't until Minseok's return that he learns of the joyful cheers the crowd has made at the drop of the blade and roll of the heads.  
  
"Your Majesty, your people are delighted. They see you as a hero." Minseok ends his summary and he shares a satisfied smile with the king. Junmyeon nods. He knows what are to happen next--an appearance at the Royal Balcony, an issuance of the King's Word, and a day in which he declares the kingdom's new beginning. He's prepared himself for this but it seems as surreal as it originally felt like in his dreams. It makes him nervous, yes, yet he can't stop his mind to wander to something else, a request of last night that felt as if it's something that his heart has long wanted to do.  
  
"The visit to...Hamheung" Junmyeon trails off with a tinge of second thought. He says it still. Minseok nods, parting his lips for an answer.  
  
"The carriages are ready, your Majesty," Minseok says. "The royal messenger has returned this morning and the Duke has confirmed his stay in his palace."  
  
Junmyeon hums, fighting again the tight curls of his heart in his chest. Truth be told, a part of him wishes the Duke will refuse but then that is a moment when he forgets that he is a king, and a refusal to his wish is crime. He dislikes the absolute rules.  
  
He doesn't want to force the Duke to see him. Though Junmyeon badly wants to see him because now that the palace has found its peace, he believes it is now his time to find the resolution he and the Duke deserves.  
  
"The day after tomorrow," Junmyeon decides. "We'll go to Hamheung."  
  
Minseok nods. From there on, Junmyeon resolves that there is no turning back.  
  
  
  
  
Hamheung is a wonderful city. Perhaps not as grand and as impressive as the capital but it still exudes a lasting impression. Its people are just as many, but the whole city showcases more vibrant markets and merchants. It's bustling even if far from his direct controls, and Junmyeon is proud of his chosen leaders.  
  
The royal convoy, three horse-drawn vehicles, attracts a sizable amount of people, all curious and excited to catch a glimpse of its regal horses and carriages. They've probably heard of the rumors, of the King visiting their city, which ideally shouldn't have happened but it already has and it can't be helped. The crowd goes thicker as they gallop into the city's heart.  
  
"Do you think I should greet them?" Junmyeon asks Minseok who sits next to him. He's looking past the windows of his carriage, the outside visible from his side but the vehicle's interiors hidden from the people's sight.  
  
"Does the Majesty wish to?"  
  
"Yes. They seem to long for a sight of their King," Junmyeon answers. His hands are turning cold, perhaps because of the excitement. He has never done this for quite a long time and he's sure he's going to enjoy the thrill and the warm welcome of the Elion people.  
  
Minseok shoves the curtains to the sides and takes off the glass shields that keeps the carriage's inside from being seen. He leans and tells the coachman to slow down. When their pace decelerates, Minseok then gestures at Junmyeon to start. And so Junmyeon does.  
  
He peeks, raises his hand, and waves, Then he sees the people gasp. In a snap, they're shouting, waving frantically at him. Their lips pull to gleeful smiles, excitement plastered on almost all faces. "Long live the King!" They all exclaimed and Junmyeon feels simply elated. He continues to wave from one side of the carriage to the other.  
  
"They have loved you, your Majesty," Minseok remarks and Junmyeon simply nods in agreement. Then he stops.  
  
The words echo in his ear and before he knows it, they're piercing right through his chest. He's still waving, albeit mindlessly. The cheers of his people slowly drowning in silence as his mind collapses to a single thought, a little close to a wish. _He has loved you._  
  
"Is there something wrong, your Majesty?" Minseok asks, brows slanted in immediate worry. Junmyeon shakes his head and forces himself to a reassuring smile, apologizing to Minseok before going back to his waiting crowd. A child waves at him, yelling his name and joining the chant of the rest of the adults around him. He waves back.  
  
  
  
  
The palace at Hamheung is small, like a mansion two floors high with a garden proportional to its size. Despite it, it still is royal and grand. The exteriors are intricate enough for a duke's residence and the gates adorned with his insignia tower above everything that passes through it. A fountain greets them, a roundabout that covers the palace's entrance. Red carpet is already laid on the stairs that lead to the main doors. A couple of guards stand on its side and Junmyeon is satisfied that his request to keep his people in this foreign palace at minimum is observed.  
  
As his carriage comes closer, Junmyeon can make out a familiar figure, the Duke. At his sight, Junmyeon feels the expected heavy push on his chest, prompting him to heave a sigh. His heart thumps, pounding hard against his ribs, and his stomach is making horrible churns. His hands turn cold, fingers playing with the hem of his dress. He's nervous, obviously. When Minseok gives him a concerned look, Junmyeon is just too antsy to care.  
  
The person is Kim Jongin, Duke of Hamgyeong.  
  
  
  
  
Three years ago was the last time Junmyeon and Jongin had seen each other. It was back in the capital when he was a newly crowned king. Things were starting to get messed up, and Junmyeon's time was mostly wasted on figuring out ways out of the then hardly manageable court's mischief. But at that one particular night, he wasn't thinking about how to take his enemies down and out of their titles. He was trying to salvage a relationship from falling apart.  
  
Jongin was there, breathing heavily as he stormed in Junmyeon's room with an apparent rage. He said he waited, spent four hours alone in Hangang. They had an agreement to meet, an arrangement they had planned weeks ago, but things weren't working as Junmyeon expected and one had to stand the other up.  
  
Before Junmyeon sat on the throne in the capital, he was a prince in exile, an illegitimate child of the old King. Sent far south from the capital, his time was all his. In his exile, he felt free, far from the troubles of the palace he once carried when he was a kid. Meeting Jongin, then a viscount, made his freedom become more special. They became friends and they eventually fell in love. They hugged, kissed, and made love. Marrying each other was the only thing both of them ever wanted. But one fine morning, they both woke up to the news that the Queen was ill. The court was in disarray. They declared Junmyeon the heir apparent. Three days later, she died. Junmyeon was the King.  
  
Since that day, Junmyeon and Jongin knew they were drifting apart. Not to mention that they were trying to keep their relationship a secret until everything was settled, until Junmyeon felt secured as a ruler and as a person with the right to live. Junmyeon wanted them to be patient, the most patient a man could possibly be, until he himself could tell the world that he's going to marry the person he most loved. But things had to be really complicated. A day's time wasn't enough for Junmyeon anymore. The freedom he once treasured was gone in a snap and he couldn't keep up with the demands, from the court, from his people, from his heart.  
  
Soon, he found himself waking up every day like an eon farther away from Jongin, as if he no longer knew him. Or perhaps, he wouldn't want to admit, it was the other way around.  
  
"I...sent a messenger," Junmyeon said. His voice mumbled as his words felt like squeezing his throat. It was a lie.  
  
"Well, thanks for telling the wind to keep me cold in the banks. It was very much appreciated," Jongin snapped, not an an ounce of attempt to hide his frustration.  
  
"Don't," Junmyeon raised his index finger, pointing it at Jongin. "Don't you dare talk to me like that!" He raised his voice, echoing in the room.  
  
Jongin shook his head with his lips pulled to an annoyed smirk. "I'm...I'm sorry then, your Majesty." It was a taunting sarcasm.  
  
"How dare you!" Junmyeon charged at Jongin, grabbing him by the collar and pulling him closer. His eyes were glaring, face red in anger but Jongin's face didn't show any regret. He wasn't sorry.  
  
The argument that filled the room was strong, too loud and too fierce. It carried on for minutes until Junmyeon could feel tears well at the corners of his eyes. But he didn't let them fall because he was strong. He was the King. He needed to be assertive, dominating. He was absolute, powerful, and he believed everything he thought was right was always right. When with Jongin, he thought he was never wrong.  
  
The screams and shattered glasses stopped when Jongin stormed out of the room. Junmyeon, fueled by anger, banished him from the palace. It was the worst of his moves. He was young and irrational and he regretted the order. He renounced it but three years later, not a single shadow of Jongin has graced the capital since then.  
  
They were once lovers. Now in Junmyeon's head, they're neither enemies nor friends.  
  
  
  
  
"Your Majesty," Jongin greets. He bows quickly as if trying to avoid a gaze that is all too familiar to him. He keeps his head down, waiting for the king to respond, or at least how he wishes his gesture looks like to Junmyeon.  
  
"Jongin."  
  
Jongin raises his head, a little flustered and uneasy when he hears his actual name. But he remains calm, keeping his posture firm. He bows his head once more when Junmyeon walks past him. "This way, your Majesty."  
  
Jongin guides Junmyeon inside, into the spacious hall then to the right, where a maid comes out from a room with an empty tray. Junmyeon smells cinnamon, his favorite tea flavor and he can't stop himself from smiling. Jongin still doesn't forget.  
  
They enter the room and the smell of cinnamon fills Junmyeon's nostrils. He inhales, taking in the scent as he pauses by the door. When he breathes out, he sees Jongin in front of him, waiting for his gesture to take his seat.  
  
"Don't rush," Junmyeon says with a gentle smile. He closes the door, walks towards his seat, cushioned in red cotton, and plops ungracefully to Jongin's surprise. Junmyeon chuckles Jongin's reaction, shaking his head. "Drop the formalities. It's just us."  
  
Jongin simply nods. He's hesitant and nervous. Junmyeon knows it when Jongin bites on his lower lip and reflexively jogs his leg--right leg. Junmyeon reaches for it, leaning until his hand touches Jongin's knee. "Please...don't."  
  
There is a sharp gasp but Junmyeon ignores it. "I'm here as an old friend. If..." He trails off, raising his head to catch Jongin's gaze. "If you still consider me as a friend."  
  
Jongin closes his eyes, heaving a long sigh before opening his eyes, meeting Junmyeon's with apparent ease this time. "Yes. Yes. I still do."  
  
"That's good to hear." Junmyeon says, lips slowly curving to a satisfied smile. He can't help himself. Jongin proving him wrong, this time, for the first time, feels surprisingly amazing, relieving. "So, how have you been?" He continues. He takes the teapot and pours its content on Jongin's cup, prompting Jongin to almost stop him but Junmyeon carries on. Again, he isn't a king this time. At least in front of Jongin.  
  
"Doing good. My home in Hamgyeong's currently under renovation so I'm staying here in the meantime," Jongin says. He takes his cup and sips. "Congratulations by the way. You've won."  
  
Junmyeon almost forgets about his victory. It's news throughout the country and it definitely would reach Jongin's doorsteps even without him personally telling about it. And at that point he realizes he's won the people but he is yet to win the struggle in his heart. "Thanks. I'm sorry Taemin had to be executed. I knew you two were friends."  
  
Jongin shakes his head with a dry laughter. "We _were_. I would have pierced my blades in him had I known of his rebellion plots. Sneaky guy."  
  
Junmyeon shares a chuckle before taking his cup which he filled himself. They've finally broken the awkward wall and he likes it. He sips from his cup and nods with approval. "Great tea. Where did you get this?"  
  
"They sell it in the markets. Hamheung's markets are perfect." There is clear confidence in Jongin's answer but exudes unfamiliarity to Junmyeon's ears.  
  
"I see. I should bring some back to Hanseong I suppose," Junmyeon mutters before taking another sip.  
  
Jongin pauses at the sound of the capital's name, as if it's hit a sensitive part of his memory. He ignores it and he smiles, nodding in agreement. "Yes. You should."  
  
Silence falls on them right away. Junmyeon looks around, as if examining their room, and decides that it's a perfect moment to buy more time before getting back to his purpose. It's a fresh place anyway and a momentary appreciation of the new, especially from a king, shouldn't hurt.  
  
The room is small but perfectly cozy, its pastel colors soothing to their eyes. Paintings hang on its walls partnered with calligraphy posters. Junmyeon knows the familiar curves and halts of brushes, characters Jongin had painted himself. He nods approvingly, a bit of pride creeping up his chest, as he puts back his cup back on the table.  
  
The silence becomes close to unbearable and so Junmyeon begins. "So..." he trails off, deciding that he should now get to the chase. "I think it's time for me to...to talk about us. Three years ago."  
  
Jongin stiffens but his expression shows an expectant look. He tears his gaze away from Junmyeon like a desperate escape but there's nowhere to go to. He sighs, a resigned one.  
  
"Please don't get me wrong," Junmyeon says defensively. He has wished not to start it this way because he knows he'll end up beginning it with his nervously crafted disclaimers. Which he actually does. "I'm not here to...to condemn you. For leaving me at the palace. Or punish you. Or to make you...come back."  
  
He's right. He isn't there to take Jongin back. He isn't there to make Jongin realize that he had done wrong, that he missed a chance and has lost what he could be-- _what they could be._ Jongin remains silent, rubbing his thumb on the edge of his cup. He lets Junmyeon continue.  
  
"I want to apologize," the king says. He's there to mend what could still be fixed, and to end what they haven't ended yet.  
  
"I was...less understanding," Junmyeon continues then he laughs to himself. "I could make a list of how I could have saved...uh, us but that would definitely be too long."  
  
Jongin still doesn't say anything but gives a really short smile, too short that Junmyeon almost doesn't catch it. "And it won't change anything," Junmyeon says.  
  
"Sorry," Jongin finally speaks. Junmyeon is a little caught off guard, not expecting Jongin to butt in, but he composes quickly. "I thought it was easy. I didn't realize it was difficult....to love a King."  
  
Junmyeon knows Jongin was patient. He tried really hard but people have limits. Maybe it's Junmyeon's fault, maybe partly, maybe not at all. But Jongin reached his tipping point and Junmyeon missed that part where he can save Jongin back. He doesn't even take offence in Jongin's words because they're true. It's hard to love a king like him.  
  
"I understand," Junmyeon does. He really does. "It was also difficult to love...as a King."  
  
"We all had flaws," Jongin mutters.  
  
Junmyeon nods. "And we're not infallible."  
  
"Thank you, though, for giving me the chance." Jongin says.  
  
"Thank you, too, for...the chance. Yes."  
  
They're out of words but they completely understand each other. It isn't easy, facing a three-year long uneasy silence between them. The hurt leaves a bit of a pang, a small twist in their heaving chests. But it's part of goodbyes and they've finally said it, although worded differently, to an unsettling past that was almost never concluded.  
  
They sip on their cups silently, the taste of cinnamon lingering on their tongue and lips. Junmyeon smiles and Jongin smiles back. And so they've finally reached the end, the closure they thought they'd never have. Now they're off to a new start.  
  
  
  
  
Junmyeon emerges at the Royal Balcony. The crowd, a huge ocean of people that extends to as far as his eyes can see, cheers at them. "Long live the King!" They all yelled in unison, singing and dancing, celebrating a day that is now a glorious part of their history.  
  
Junmyeon raises a hand, waving his right now adorned with rings of precious stones. It feels a little heavy but he's too happy to care. To his left stands his consort, Do Kyungsoo, Earl of Jeonju. Good news after good news. Minseok knows this game of kings. He knows a marriage will keep his people closer so he's advised Junmyeon to find a consort. The sooner the better.  
  
"The people's elation is waning. You should win them back," Minseok has told him. Junmyeon understands and does as suggested six months after meeting the marquis in his visit to Jeolla. And now they're bathed in beautiful petals, reveling in the joy of their kingdom's celebration. Kyungsoo raises his hand and the crowd's cheers grow louder.  
  
Junmyeon sees Jongin just below the balcony, next to him is another duke, Chanyeol of Gangneung. Junmyeon's heard of their engagement and he has wished nothing but the best for them. He's glad that they accepted his invitation, too. They both share smiles, genuine smiles, not a tinge of guilt or regret.  
  
Junmyeon mumbles a "thank you" at which Jongin acknowledges with a graceful bow. If goodbyes never existed, then happiness probably don't as well.

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. The story is loosely based on Elizabeth I’s early life as a queen.  
> 2\. You probably wouldn't care about how nobility works here but in case you are curious, the noble titles are based on nobility divisions of the Goryeo dynasty mixed with a bit of British peerage rankings. Peerage rules, however, follow neither that of the Goryeo nor the British. I made them all up!  
> 3\. I don’t know what happened. This should be a 2k-word fic but it grew more than a thousand and a half words longer. Anyway, sorry again Chrys for diverging from your original prompt. :(


End file.
